The Not-So-Super 8

Since we had plans to spend Saturday at my grandma's house in Huntington, the three of us sallied forth on Friday to Price and checked into the Super 8 for what we imagined to be a luxurious night. Little did we know that Eddie is terrified of 2-star hotels. The following is a truncated transcript of the rest of our stay:

7:30 PM Dave checks in. Eddie screams and cries after being placed on the lobby floor. He insists that he will not swim in the pool.

7:35 PM Kristen and Eddie enter Room 226, the scene of Eddie's worst nightmares, apparently. Eddie screams and cries and demands that we go to "Cavin's house" (aka the Barton family cabin).

7:40 PM Eddie is given a cookie to help him come to grips with the Super 8.

8:00 PM Despite Eddie's protests, we head to the pool. This is, after all, our main purpose for staying in the Super 8.

8:15 PM Eddie is terrified of the pool. Perhaps he can read the sign on the wall that says "A swimming pool is like a community bathtub. Do not drink the water."

8:25 PM The other pool patrons vacate the premises and Eddie begins to warm up to the pool.

8:45 PM We leave the pool despite Eddie's protests.

9:00 PM Spongebob saves us from going to bed at 9:00.

9:30 PM Lights out! Eddie is placed in his pack & play.

9:31 PM Screams of "DADDY HOLD YOU!" ring through the Super 8.

9:40 PM Eddie joins us in the king size bed.

9:42 PM Eddie joins me on my side of the king size bed.

9:43 PM "Hi Mama!"

9:44 PM "Big bed."

9:45 PM "My pillow."

9:46 PM "Hi Mama!"

9:47 PM "BATMAN! BATMAN!"

9:48 PM Me: "Eddie, shh. It's time to sleep."

9:49 PM Eddie grabs my nose. "HONK!"

9:50 PM "Hi Mama!"

.....

10:40 PM "Love oo. Love oo."

10:43 PM SILENCE

10:45 PM Eddie sounds like he's asleep. I am perched on the edge of the bed and can feel him against my back and my head. I don't dare move.

11:15 PM I can't stand it any more and have to turn over. I move my head. Eddie is startled and wraps his arm around my neck.

11:20 PM I give up and roll over and learn that Eddie is wrapped around my head. Now he's wrapped around my face.

11:25 PM Eddie sits up. "Lay down," I say. He lays down across the bed the wrong way.

11:26 PM I reposition Eddie, despite the fear that this will wake him up. It doesn't.

11:27 PM We all sleep... poorly.

.....

5:59 AM "Wake up?"

6:00 AM "Hi Mama!"

6:01 AM "Knuckles!" Eddie punches the back of my head.

6:02 AM Me: "OW! Go back to sleep."

6:03 AM "NO! Lights on."

6:05 AM "Bonk head." Eddie headbutts me.

6:06 AM Me: "OW! Go back to sleep. It's still night time."

6:07 AM "Make day. Lights on."

.....

6:15 AM I give up. The lights are on and Spongebob saves us from an immediate breakfast.